Royane Real
Is a Fear of Being Socially Rejected Holding You Back in Life?
By Royane Real
Do you hold back from trying to start new relationships because you are worried that you will be rejected? Are you shy? Does your shyness and fear of getting rejected keep you from having the relationships you want? Are you lonely much of the time?
If a fear of rejection is holding you back from forming new friendships or relationships, there is help available. You can learn to greatly overcome your shyness and your fear of being rejected.
One of the reasons why rejection can cause us so much difficulty is that in our minds we often tie rejection to so many other ugly words that cause us even more pain. Humiliated. Inadequate. Useless. Loser. Not good enough. Pathetic.
The more we dwell negatively upon an instance of rejection, the harder it becomes to get up the courage to face another occasion when we might get rejected again. Fear of getting rejected again can lead to a life of increasing loneliness and social isolation.
When we experience rejection, we can tell ourselves that we are doomed to be rejected forever; that any rejection from another person is proof that we are somehow not good enough, and that we were wrong to ever think that another person could like us.
But is this the only way to look at rejection? Remember that people who have healthy self- esteem, who are outgoing and who make lots of social overtures to others, get rejected too. The difference is that they don’t feel nearly as troubled by rejection. They don’t take it personally. People who are socially confident don’t condemn themselves every time they get rejected by somebody.
Socially confident people don’t view rejection as proof that they are flawed.
Why do some people have such a hard time dealing with getting rejected socially while others are not troubled so much by rejection? There are many reasons. Rejection is often much more troubling to those people who are very emotionally sensitive, who have low self-esteem, or who have had a very dysfunctional or abusive childhood.
There is good news though. Even if you are very emotionally sensitive or shy, even if you didn’t get much emotional support as you were growing up, you can still learn to change the way you talk to yourself about the experience of rejection.
This article was written by author Royane Real.
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Learn to Be Popular - even if You're Shy and Lonely!
By Royane Real
Do you ever with you had a better social life? Are you tired of being lonely? Perhaps you suffer from shyness and you wish you could learn how to be outgoing and popular.
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