By Royane Real

Author of  " How to Overcome Your Shyness and Your Fear of Rejection and Have the Friends and Lovers You've Always Wanted"
 

Do you ever get rejected by other people when you try to befriend them, or when you ask someone for a date?  How does the experience of rejection make you feel?  Not all of us have the same reaction to getting rejected. For some people, this experience is much more painful than for others.

Is being rejected an experience that is easy for you to handle?  Or is getting rejected something that is very difficult and humiliating for you?  Is your fear of getting rejected so strong that it keeps you from trying to get to approach people you would like to befriend or date?

If you have a strong fear of getting rejected, you may feel envious of popular people who seem to have many friends.  You may imagine that these popular people never experience rejection.  You may even tell yourself rejection is only an experience that happens to losers like you. 

In fact, that isn’t true at all.  The truth is that everyone gets rejected at times.  The people who are popular and confident occasionally get rejected as well.    

The only people who never experience rejection are those who never interact with other human beings.

Otherwise, everyone occasionally experiences situations in which they are rejected.  You might get turned down for coffee, for a dance, for a party, a relationship, or even for marriage.

Rejection is never fun to experience, and for some people, it’s not easy to overcome. 

The difference is that socially confident people know how to handle rejection easily and effectively, while people who lack social confidence are absolutely devastated every time they are rejected.  There are ways to handle rejection that make it worse, and there are ways to handle rejection that make it far less painful.  

For people who are shy and lonely, every rejection can be a long lasting, emotionally traumatic experience. 

How does a person with healthy self-esteem deal with rejection? 

A person with healthy self-esteem realizes that taking occasional social and emotional risks is a necessary part of developing relationships.   If someone turns them down, they don’t take it personally.  They just move on and look for someone else who will be more receptive.

It doesn’t occur to a socially confident person to think that the reason they were rejected is because they are deeply flawed or inadequate. 

After receiving a rejection, a person who has healthy self esteem might think to themselves, “Gee, it’s too bad my invitation wasn’t accepted.  Oh well.  Maybe it was bad timing”  Or they might decide, “Maybe that guy is just a jerk I’d never like anyway.  I think I’ll call Bill instead and ask him to go to the game with me”.

In fact, socially successful people tend to take all the credit for their social successes for themselves, and when they do encounter a social fiasco, they usually assign the blame to the other person!  This is the opposite of how shy and lonely people often react.  Shy and lonely people tend to grab all the blame for themselves if their social overture is rejected, and if their overture is accepted they may believe the other person made a mistake in accepting them! 

The good news is that you can actually learn to use some of the same kinds of thinking and behaviors used by socially confidant people.  You can learn new ways to talk to yourself so that rejection doesn’t feel so terrible.  You can learn to have more confidence to approach others and make new friends and gain the lovers you want.

By Royane Real

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Learn to Be Popular - even if You're Shy and Lonely!

By Royane Real

Do you ever with you had a better social life?  Are you tired of being lonely?  Perhaps you suffer from shyness and you wish you could learn how to be outgoing and popular.

My popular special report How to Overcome Your Shyness and Your Fear of Rejection and Have the Friends and Lovers You've Always Wanted   will teach you everything you need to know about how to overcome your rejection fears and shyness. 

Learn what to say to yourself to overcome your fears.  Learn to handle rejection much more easily. 

Isn't it time to stop being on the outside looking in?  Now is the time and here is your opportunity to change your life from one of being lonely to one of being popular. 

Testimonial from a happy reader :

"Some other authors will charge you way more for self help programs that won't be written as good as this one, but this one is packed with information and is worth every penny." Testimonial by Niko Sekuloski, Detroit

This exciting special report change your life forever!   

" How to Overcome Your Shyness and Your Fear of Rejection and Have the Friends and Lovers You've Always Wanted "

Download it now at  http://www.lulu.com/real     

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