Special Friends – The Thin Gray Line Between a Special Friend and Lover
By Sean Carter
Introductory comments By Royane Real
Author of “Your Guide to Finding Friends, Making Friends and Keeping Friends”
In many parts of the world, friendships between unrelated men and women are simply not allowed. There are countries in which both the man and the woman might be severely punished for having such a friendship.
To outsiders, these rules forbidding men and women to be close friends might seem very cruel, but everyone in that particular society knows what the rules are. By forbidding friendships between men and women, life stays very simple.
In the modern western world, men and women are usually allowed to be friends, even if they are not related. Sometimes men and women have very close friendships with each other that last many years.
When men and women do become close friends, there is often confusion about what the nature of their friendship should be. In particular, many people wonder if a man and woman can really stay good friends and ignore any sexual tensions or romantic desires that might exist between them. Some people say that sexual and romantic feelings are inevitable when men and women become close friends.
Can men and women really have close relationships that stay platonic? Or are they just kidding themselves?
Relationships can be very tricky, especially between men and women. There are many different kinds of loving feelings, and those kinds of loving feelings can change over time. It is quite possible that romantic feelings could start to grow in a friendship that for many years was platonic
If a man and a woman are friends, and if romantic feelings start to get stirred up, should they act upon it, or should they simply stay friends? Does a friendship get destroyed forever once romantic feelings are introduced?
The following article by Sean Carter discusses some of the aspects of long term close relationships between men and women.
In this article, Sean makes the point that sometimes long time friends can start to realize that there is something more between them. They realize they have a growing romantic love and not just a deep friendship between them.
( The introductory comments which appear above are by Royane Real )
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Feature article:
Special Friends – The Thin Gray Line Between a Special Friend and Lover
By Sean Carter
Love and friendship are often considered as the two sides of the same coin. One can not survive away from the other. Still there is a thin line between a friend and a lover; and if someone does not probe deep in to the relationship, often the thin grey line between the ‘special friend’ and lover may seem blurred and unrecognizable.
One of the key attributes of today’s society is the gradual demise of the authoritarian control of social institutions like marriage, class, corporations, or any other shared alliances.
Evidently the focus has shifted towards the voluntary, informal and often quite intimate relationship manifested in being friends. More and more people are turning towards friendship to secure a more reliable and less demanding social circle.
But when we talk about friendship and love the questions that naturally come up to our mind are whether a purely platonic friendship can exist; and whether friendship with the opposite sex can be completely devoid of physical enticement.
One of the primary aspects of platonic friendship is that it is open-ended, thus allowing more ways to explore and rejoice the glory of friendship.
Friendship is a particular sense of being, a journey towards becoming intimate with the other, a journey, which is destined to a state of unconditional yet immensely gratifying relationship. The psychological process of being attracted to a friend or a special friend is to a certain extent analogous to the psychological and emotional progression of love.
So, there is no doubt that friendship establishes the foundation of love. Friendship is that fertile ground from which the fragrant flowers of love will sprout.
Most people want their lovers to be their ‘soul mates’. Being a soul mate has everything to do with being an intimate and unconditional friend, which are in fact the common traits of a special friend. That is where the line between a special friend and lover becomes increasingly indistinct and delicate.
But it is not our civil obligation to dissect and analyze each emotional and psychological change to impeccably categorize our relationship. We are not under any kind of pressure to keep the line, dividing a special friend and lover.
If the two souls find it increasingly strenuous to restrain the desire of knowing each other better through mutual closeness and emotional bonding on a deeper level beyond friendship, then it makes perfect sense to become oblivious of the line. Depending upon the sincerity of mutual feelings, one should not hesitate to take a step beyond friendship and steer the relationship to the next level.
Even a few decades ago, social networking consisted of only the people living in the locality, but with the emergence of the internet, now people have the opportunity to expand their friends circle. This new technology has also made it easier to reach out and convey your feelings and emotions to that special friend through free friendship ecards ( http://www.123greetings.com/friendship/ ) or online greetings.
Taking a relationship towards the next level, becoming a true lover from a sincere special friend relies on good communication, whether online or offline. Expressing the right word at the right time, often taking advantage of anonymity that the technology provides, proves to be an effective way for those contemplating to become more than a special friend.
Whether, a lover or a special friend, the success in a relationship resides in the shared aspirations towards knowledge, wisdom and understanding, which dwell beyond them. At the same time friendship acts as a band which is flexible enough to hold the intricacies and troubles of being together and strong enough not to split, as the saying goes “Friendship is love with understanding.”
Article Source: http://www.articleset.com
Sean Carter writes on holidays, events and celebrations around the world. He also writes on family, relationships, inspiration, religion, love and friendship. He is a writer with special interest in ecard industry. He writes for 123greetings.com
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